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"Dark night of the soul"? Maybe I like it in the dark...

Jun. 21st, 2012 | 02:21 am

We moved last year, and up until recently, we thought we would have to move this year, too.

This has inspired me to attempt to reduce the amount of things we own, and frankly, I am grateful to be here at least another year so as to reduce more. The amount of stuff we owned was way out of hand.

Particularly, I've been working on books lately. It was such an obvious area for reduction, since books are so heavy. One of the friends, bless him, who helped us move asked "Why do you read so much? It's bad for my back." Also, many books are easily available at the library, and I'm interested in the prospect of someday having an e-reader of some sort, as I whole-heartedly adopted the digital-only model for music and video. Lastly, for something so heavy, they get used so rarely...I just haven't been in the mood to read much for at least two years.

So, many books are going. And a lot of what I had was spiritual in nature. And as I'm finding new homes for these books, I'm reflecting on my own spirituality (or lack of same), and needing to put my thoughts down somewhere to get a sense of where I'm at.

Read more...Collapse )

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No one.

Mar. 26th, 2012 | 08:58 pm

Finish Mass Effect 3 ending again.

Run down to the Main Battery. Garrus says “So who needs their ass kicked now?”

The blessed answer, after so long, is “No one.”

Maybe we’ll be able to retire somewhere warm and tropical, after all.

SpoilersCollapse )

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Mar. 5th, 2012 | 10:52 pm

OMG Mass Effect 3 in one hour!!!!111!!

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My Landlord Just Threatened to Evict Me

Feb. 7th, 2012 | 10:11 am

I'd thought he was okay, and that our relationship was good.

However, I just checked my e-mail today and saw that he e-mailed last night, saying that, as of the time of writing, the rent was now late by one day, and a late fee applies, and he had tried to call my partner and left a message but didn't get him, and that if he didn't have it within the next nine days, he would proceed with eviction.

Wow, seriously? We have never been late on the rent before, and at this point, the rent was late by ONE whole day*. WTF?

* We pay using our bank's bill payer service, too, and he knows this, so in all likelihood, the check was in the mail yesterday and he probably received it today. (I'm actually surprised he didn't have it on time, because, like I said, there's never been a problem before, and believe me, I'll be checking on the mailing/postmark date.)

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I Just Swore at a Service Person

Feb. 2nd, 2012 | 07:43 pm

I try not to do that. And most of the time, it's no problem not too, because most of the time, they are genuinely trying to be helpful.

Ugh, but I just got off the phone with one of those places that buys back old electronics (in this case, a laptop), and they offered me only one-quarter of what they quoted me online due to "extensive scratching of the case." So I asked the person I was on the phone with to send it back to me, and he started in about "did you read the the terms when you requested your quote?"

Generally, I know these companies MO is to pay you as little as possible, and they can usually get away with it since old electronics is something your average person can do nothing with, making it practically worthless to most people anyway. Nonetheless, they are deceptive, because they pretty much ALWAYS quote you more online than they will actually pay. I just didn't expect that much of an over-quote.

And I didn't expect to get hassled when I declined their offer. (I mean, when I'm trying to cancel free trials of things or whatever, I expect to get a sales spiel- they are trying to sell me something after all. I didn't expect one from a company that's trying to buy something from me.)

And when I told the guy he was wasting my time, I didn't expect to be told to call back when it wouldn't be a waste of my time.

So I swore at him and asked him when would it not be a waste of time to talk to someone who had previously told me it "no problem" to send the laptop (that is legally still my property) back to me but then refused to do so without giving me a spiel and questioning whether I read the website I submitted the quote on, etc.

He called me childish, and said he was only trying to reach an agreement with me. This was the first time he had even hinted that there was any room for negotiation.

He then asked what I thought was fair for it, I told him, and he offered me ten buck less than what I asked for. Which was DOULE the initial offer (and still only half what I was quoted online, btw), and which I accepted.

The thing is, I try not to swear at service people. I've been one, and I know it's not fun, and I know they're just doing their job.

The fact remains that, in many cases, the companies they work for are dishonest and manipulative, and you usually can't talk to the CEO and swear at them.

Still, in this economy especially, people have very little control of who they work for and how their employer treats them.

So I try not to swear at service people. But I when I do, I think it's not entirely unreasonable of me to blame the companies they represent for putting both them and me in an unfair position, where they have no choice but to act as agents of more powerful organizations that try to use me.

When I was a service person, I think I blamed the individuals who swore at me, though, and ultimately, we are each in control of our actions.

Maybe, though, should I (godforbid) have to go back to work for such a company, I will not take it so personally in the future, and understand that the customer is in just as bad of a situation as I am, in many cases.


The moral of the story is, you can't trust the system. (NSFW)

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Randomly, my Fandoms, and what I've been Watching

Dec. 6th, 2011 | 01:19 am


I've had a few additions in the last couple of years.

A and I got talked into trying Supernatural and loved it, though the current season is giving me some trouble.

After watching A play Dragon Age: Origins, I finally bit the bullet and taught myself to use a MODERN video game console (the last I'd played was Atari 2600), because I fell. so. hard. for it. My obsession only grew with the release of Dragon Age II.

Eventually I started playing other games, enough that I'd now call myself a gamer. Only one other game has yet managed to enter fandom territory for me, however, and that's Deus Ex: Human Revolution.

Which is where my new username and userpic is from, btw.

Other Watching

We've also been watching Archer, which I'm a little ashamed to admit I like, because so many of the characters are sexist, racist, etc. I eventually managed to resolve my cognitive dissonance over that, though, when I realized that you aren't really supposed to like those characters.

We watched ALL THE STAR TREK! Which only deepened my DS9 fandom, and made me wonder how TOS ever managed to spawn such awesome later shows. I guess it was awesome in its day...

We also tried and liked How I Met Your Mother, though last week's episode is making me wonder whether it is about to jump the shark. I haven't seen yesterday's episode yet, though, so here's holding out hope.

I also liked Big Bang Theory, though A couldn't stand Sheldon, saying he has known too many people who actually were like that. I'll probably continue it on my own when I get the chance.

I also finally saw the ENTIRE Lord of the Rings trilogy. 'bout time, eh?

We're currently watching Fringe, which I'm very impressed with on a number of levels. We're only through most of season 2, though, so sadly, I can't discuss it with other fans, yet.

Finally, we watched Revolutionary Girl: Utena, as I remembered quite a number of my friends really liked it. On the balance, I guess I liked it, but I was really kind of angry with the ending. I'm not a stupid person, but I didn't get it. Cut for more discussion of that...Collapse )

So, those are the stories I've been consuming. I'm embarrassed to admit I haven't been reading many books in the past two years. What can I say, though? I just haven't felt like it. I am hopeful it's a phase, and am determined not to be judge-y about it.

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State of Me

Dec. 1st, 2011 | 10:02 pm

I see that I had dropped off of LJ just after I quit my job two years ago. Here's what's happened with me since then:

I searched for a job for a long while, and found nothing. Who knew there was really very little work in IT Support in South Jersey? Or maybe I just didn't know where to look, but, I gave up eventually. I looked in other fields, but got no interviews. I worked part-time retail briefly (and wow! the working conditions have gotten REALLY bad there). I attended massage school for a while, but it was expensive, and I really didn't like the school I chose, so I withdrew to save money. (That school was a bad choice on my part- I chose it because it was close by, not because it was the best school for me.)

I might have done better overall and eventually found work, but truly, I went through a pretty severe depression again, with the peak (depth?) of it being about a year ago. It was kind of similar to what I went through in college, except this time I couldn't just pack up my life and go live with family for a while to get through it. At this point I'm still coming through it, but I'm pretty certain the worst is long past. If my history is any indicator, I'll get through near another six years or so before this happens again. I know life is unpredictable, but, here's hoping...

Having gone through all that while living with A, my s.o., was very tough on the relationship, but very good for knowing each other. Long ago, I asked my mom if I loved someone, how would I know if we were compatible enough to marry, and she said something to the effect of "You just go through a bunch of stuff together." So, me being jobless and going through an acute depression counts as some of that "stuff."

And last year, we got engaged. I have no idea when we'll actually marry- we're pretty content with the way things are- but we count each other as definite life partners now, with even more certainty and commitment than we had when we were "just" cohabiting s.o.'s.

Towards the beginning of 2011, A got really dissatisfied with his job, and began searching for new work. Nothing came through for a long while. He'd get interviews that wouldn't pan out, and then he got a job, but within the first two weeks he discovered that the company really wasn't stable (too many family members employed, some of whom may or may not have been involved in illegal activities, a super-high turnover among the non-family employees, and the quality of work not up industry standards). Fortunately, his job search was still on-going, and before too long at the non-stable company, he had another offer in hand from a much larger corporation. (And one my brother-in-law has actually worked for and recommended.)

So, he took that, and we moved to Maryland. Ugh, moving. Hated the process, but the place we are living now is nice.

Currently, I'm spending my time trying to get the new place in order and trying to get rid of excess stuff. Moving was really eye-opening as to how much stuff we have.

I've also taken up knitting. (If you're on Ravelry, I'm using the same username there, btw.)

I had to leave my spiritual group behind when we moved, and before I join another one, I'm trying to figure out what I really want in that area of my life.

That's pretty much the outline of what's happened. I'm sure the story will get fleshed out in time as I post more here.

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I used to be shahnasa

Nov. 19th, 2011 | 03:34 pm

Truth is, I still am at heart, and that name is still part of my identity, but I've recently gone through a spell of username changing, and I like this better as an LJ handle.

So, if any of my friends still have me friended, and are still here on LJ, just know that I, nucl3arsnke am the one you knew as shahnasa.

Speaking of people still on LJ, who's still here?

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Dec. 8th, 2009 | 11:14 am

PEOPLE WHO HAVE NJ FRIENDS- We are at a critical time for marriage equality in New Jersey. The Senate will vote on the bill on Thursday, Dec 10, and by all accounts, it's going to be close. If you could spare a few minutes to call or even just e-mail your state senator, and/or repost this, it could make all the difference in the world to those who cannot now legally marry their partners.

These websites will help call and/or e-mail your senator. I recommend the first for making a call, especially if you have never done so before, as it will guide you through the process. The second website has a nice form e-mail that's easy to customize by adding in that you wish them to vote YES ON BILL S1967. Please ask me if you have any questions!

CALL: http://tools.advomatic.com/26/NewJerseyEquality/

EMAIL: https://secure.aclu.org/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=1837

PS- These websites may have some text on there from their previous objectives. Please forgive them, as they are really busy this week!

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SoCAL People! Help!

Oct. 28th, 2009 | 11:03 pm

A friend of a friend is trying to rescue a bunch of kitties from a hoarding situation. She thinks they're pretty likely to be put down if animal control gets to them first. If you are willing to foster (even for a short period of time) or adopt, please comment on her call for help.

If you have even one person in SoCAL reading you, please repost ASAP. Apparently, this situation is likely to come to a head sometime on October 29.

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